fbpx

USE UP (2)If I'm honest with myself, well, then I don't feel much like myself.  I am a terrific liar to myself.  I tell myself:

  • I can fit 20 minutes into the space of 10
  • I can feel great tomorrow even if I go to bed at 2:30 a.m.
  • I can skip the process of putting important to-do items in my planner and then successfully remember them
  • I can drop this item anywhere in my home and the gods of supreme kindness will make sure it doesn't get damaged, lost, or forgotten and my home will be uncluttered and neat

Of course, my lies do not end there.  They can extend to the other major areas of my life, including health maintenance, relationships, jobs, and finances.

There are a host of reasons why we learn to be deceiving of ourselves.  Here's a very short list of culprits:

  • we believe we are limitless in our energy
  • we believe we can “make up” for things we've lost, like our sleep
  • we believe if we've invested money, time, or our feelings into something or someone, we must keep doing so, no matter how bad the situation is
  • we believe we have to be perfect
  • we believe we cannot reveal our insecurities to others
  • we believe no one else feels insecure
  • we believe no one will understand our perspective if we act truthfully

How do you learn to be honest with yourself on a reliable, consistent basis?

In trying to fight my tendency to Procrastinate, I have had to learn how to resist my immediate impulses (for delay, avoidance, and cluttering up my living space), and tolerate the temporary discomfort that brings.  In the past few years, I have learned that gratification doesn't just come from the immediate short term.  I have learned that daily, small efforts bring me the most enduring and meaningful rewards.  Maintaining this blog is one of the examples I can think of where devoting my concentrated effort in small ways daily has paid off big time.

Where might you start?  Will it be with your finances?  Will it be with your closet?  Your essay?  Take a look at what you've chosen and ask yourself:

  • How have I been lying to myself and/or to others?
  • How has that lying served me well?
  • How has the lying hurt me or other people?
  • What is the full honest truth about the situation?
  • What will it take to make a turn-around in my behavior and attitude?
  • Do I need to tell someone about my change of heart in order to make it stick?

Try this today.  Take an entirely honest view of what you are delaying or avoiding.  Then take action without fear, instead replacing your worry with small actions that head towards the truth.  The truth of what needs to get fixed, opened, replied, reduced, or spoken.

And the winner is…

When you learn to be clear in your purpose and thinking, the honest truth tends to surface on its own.  You will feel it in your gut.  The signal will be there for you to read.  But only if you practice that ability of identifying the signal and abiding by it.  When you do, you will find:

  • you will stop hanging around the people in your life who don't treat you well
  • you will be able to keep your home and finances running more smoothly as you make choices about how you keep your living space and your budgets clear of excess and stuff you don't need
  • you will be able to make progress on projects that have been stalled if you determine they were really important to you

Big wins all around, I'd say.  Best wishes to you.

News to Share:

La maison (2)

There are just a few more days left to sign up for the Procrastination Coach October Workout Group (deadline: October 6th).  Come join us for direct instruction on how to move past your Procrastination and how to start moving forward again.